Letter to God

Hey God,IMG_5368

It’s your girl Shay here and I’m not asking for anything this time. I just wanted to say: THANK YOU!

 

Thank you for humbling me and making me understand that although I am beautifully and wonderfully made (Thanks to you)  I don’t know everything. And I have sometimes let my lack of wisdom and naivety lead me into some wild places. Places that you have let me see and feel, but never wallow in. I swear that every time I think I’ve screwed my life up in an irreversible way, you are there God speaking to me through others and letting me know everything will be okay.

Thank you for guiding me and protecting me. This time last year, I was BROKE! Broke and broken both financially and spiritually. I couldn’t see a way up, but you made a way. You put it into my heart that I needed to move and that’s exactly what I did. And I fully understand the statement “God won’t move unless you do.” Even when I’m tired like today and I don’t wanna really write this post or be mentally present at work, I can hear you. And I’m listening. Thank you for the many blessings you have bestowed upon me from a new apartment to the new job. I know it was all possible because of you. Thank you for granting me with inner peace and making it so that I am whole on my own requiring no one but you. You made me more confident.

Thank you for taking off my blinders and helping me to see myself in a new light as well as helping me to identify negative energies and people around me. Thank you for discernment. I am now able to confidently move through my life knowing that what is mine will be mines and what isn’t will never be. And that’s okay. You have made me okay with the unknown because I know through it all you have my back. Thank you for blessing me with this faith. 

Thank you for everything because I know I don’t say it enough. I am grateful and I am thankful. 

This post wasn’t really for y’all this week, but thanks for reading anyway. I’d like to hear ways in which you all are thankful. COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT. 

Peace & Love,

Shay

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Hot Girl 101 #MondayMusings

***Warning Vulgar Language***

Me to Me… and to some of y’all too.megan-thee-stallion-fever-thee-movie-teaser-01

Hop off his penis and get a life, sis. Get to the money and get to what makes you happy. Get to loving on and identifying YOU.

One of the many admirable traits that I see in men, is the ability to be selfish and love on themselves and focus on creating the life that they want for themselves. They don’t wait for life to live them, but instead get out there and live their best fucking life free of apologies and saying fuck any objections.

If they want a wife, they find her. They don’t settle. If they wanna be the rawest in the streets, they’re hopping off the porch full force. Women run around timid and scared. Asking for permission and shit. Naw sis, buss your gun (not literally), but you get what I mean. Ask for forgiveness, not permission or just say fuck em. Stop waiting for something miraculous to happen and understand God won’t move unless YOU do. Your life can’t start and stop based on the actions or attention of another person. Don’t let the only highs in your life be when your getting dicked down by a dude you like. Cuz I’m here to tell you dudes get their high from all kinda shit; vagina, head, video games, sports, porn. If the only happiness you get comes from penis or another person what happens when it leaves you? You have NOTHING left. Don’t be left with nothing.

Find your something. That something that moves you so hard that it engulfs You. I call it when you feel God in the room. The presence of God will move you so hard that you’ll be inspired and it won’t be an inspiration based on such a fleeting feeling like lust, but one of God. One of love.

I am GUILTY of this. But I’m trying to do better. I got asked by a guy I was seeing “What do you put more effort into; me or your blog?”

Awkward fucking turtle.

I’m not going to lie, I sat there with the stuck on stupid look because I already knew the answer and sadly he did too. So in that moment, I made a promise to go hard on myself and my shit like I would for any person I love. Don’t rob yourself of what you could have because you’re so focused on another person. When you’re not living the life that’s destined for you, it usually just means you’re living someone else’s life. Don’t spend time fixing others and making them feel special and neglect yourself. You are a Queen! With infinite power. It is time you start believing in that power and walking in it.

In the words of my favorite Hot Girl, Meg The Stallion, “Don’t get mad hoe! Get a bag hoe!” Focus on you and your come up and watch your life flourish.

P.S. I hope this wasn’t too ratchet. It was just weighing heavy on my soul and I had to get it out. Don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT, AND SHARE.

Peace & Love,

Shay ❤

3 Reasons Why the LPD Mixer is My New Favorite Kick It!#FeatureFriday

So I fancy myself a patron of the arts, a consumer of sorts. It’s like I love being in the mix of things, but still be able to enjoy myself and the art that’s on display. That was exactly the case at the LPD or Lemon Pine Drop #TRAPHOUSE Mixer I covered for SoCleShay on July 27,2019. And it was LIT! Below I’ve listed three reasons why I’ll definitely be attending more LPD mixers in the future:

  1. So many creatives in one space. There were producers, engineers, beat makers, rappers, singers, DJs and plethora of others that make up the Cleveland hip hop scene. I myself was lucky to be the blogger covering the INVITE ONLY event. Dj Sample God and Dj Verb were on the turntables spinning local Cleveland music. The featured performers were Elusive Life Overdose, Tee Hova, Glow Vibez Only, Ghutty Mac, Kent Archie, IndoTrybe, and NameJai. And after they finished setting fire to the stage( in a good way…I promise!) they were interviewed by The Sweet Remedy Podcast
  2. The overall aesthetic is both an artist and a consumer’s dream. It was a creative collective, music showcase, and party rolled into one. There was alcoholic beverages and catered food on deck. And one of the coolest elements to the party was you got a discount at the door if you wore a black owned clothing brand to the event. 
  3. The energy is based around support and networking. The Lemon Pine Drop 2 was brought to Cleveland by the Mix Crew made up of artists, Castle the Regular (IG: @castletheregular), Sydney Connors(IG: @muahbychichi), KiickBass(IG:@whatsabeatwithoutbass) and hosted by Proda Tha Jah(IG: @chiefjahoo).  These creatives came together to put on an event that not only showcased local Cleveland talent, but also other brands throughout the city. 

“We started it because we are artists and opportunity is slim in this city (She’s right, sadly.) so we decided to create it for ourselves. In the future, NEAR FUTURE, it will be a fest like a Black Coachella. For us by us is the main goal,” says Mix Crew member, Sydney Connors.

SoCleShay will DEFINITELY be there! I don’t need anymore convincing.

All I will say to the other party promoters and artists here in Cleveland is STEP YOUR COOKIES UP! And if you’re a creative who likes to party in a safe, fun space among other artists the Lemon Pine Drop Mixer should definitely be added to your list of upcoming events to attend.

For more information about when the mixers will take place and what YOU need to do to get an invite to this event, follow the Mix Crew and  @lemonpinedrop on IG. Don’t miss out on this DOPE ASS vibe and be looking at a post on Instagram later seeing that YOU SHUDDA BEEN THERE!

#MondayMusings: I Done Tripped and Fell Into My Feelings

Two words for you.

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Don’t know the artist, but this embodies how I feel.

 

Click bait. Click bait. Click bait.

But no seriously, I found myself in a mood last night/today (haven’t slept). I have been really in my feelings for the past few weeks. In my feelings about change and how much I hate it. I hate change because I can’t control it or its outcomes. It frustrates and saddens me because as much I would like for all things to remain the same and keep me happy, I know that just can’t be the case. It’s selfish I know. I find myself questioning everything. The people in my life, new and old. My life path to my entire identity because who am I? If not for so and so’s best friend or [insert name]’s love interest.

My relationships seem to be forever changing. My friends are getting big girl jobs, having babies and entering into serious relationships. I JUST found my first steady job that doesn’t make me want to blow my brains out or quit within the first month. As I sat up last night/this morning, I reflected on what I was feeling. Am I jealous? Do I miss their energy? Or am I the one not growing?

No. Yes. Girl bye, you’re doing great!

I had to realize that I was comparing and comparison is the thief of joy. I was overthinking and over analyzing these perceived negatives in my life without rejoicing in all the good that I have been blessed with this past year.

I swear when I was typing up this piece in my notes at 3 AM this was going to be a “woe is me… I hate my life….I’m unworthy” pity me ass piece. But as I sit here and type, I just said to myself “Nah sis. Let’s reflect on the positive.”

I’m single and my love life is lit! – So I’m not one of those extra super single people that hate relationships or anything. I would actually love to be in a healthy monogamous relationship with the right person. But first thing’s first, I gotta have a healthy relationship with myself. Many of my relationships failed in the past because I had yet to deal with my shit. My shit being my own hurt and insecurity that caused me to act like a natural born psycho while expecting someone to love and fix me when I didn’t even love myself. So in 2017, I said no more of that foolishness and for the first time ever I committed to myself. I’m committed to me in ways a man could never be and I love it. I am the protector of my own heart and the warrior against my own demons. I’m still a work in progress and in no real rush to be committed or tied down. He’ll come. I’m not worried about that anymore and when he does, I’ll be ready. In the meantime, I’m getting cute and flirting my butt off. It’s been so fun and free. So no I don’t have a man, but I’m far from lonely.

I’m working TWO jobs that I can actually say I like. – For the LONGESTTTTTT time, I could not find a job that I liked. I feel like it had a lot to do with my attitude and work ethic. I thought jobs were just like school. As long as I did the work who cares, right? Wrong! Honey, I was showing up late and barely there mentally. I think once I started to focus on myself, I made a shift in my attitude to not just be a good employee, but an exceptional one. Now don’t get me wrong, I still get off task. But my work is done and I’m on time. I’m dressing more professional and I’m taking initiative. The compliments are falling out the sky at both jobs and I really am enjoying the moment, even though I know I don’t plan to be in either role forever. It’s just nice to be looked at in a positive light and your effort noticed.

I’m being more creative.- With the revamping of my work ethic came a new perspective on what I wanted to do for a living and I came to the conclusion that I can’t see myself trading my time for money all at the expense of furthering someone else’s business. I work too hard and I’m too smart for that. I wasn’t meant to be a worker. I was meant to be a BOSS. Hence, why I started back blogging. I needed some type of control and thing that was all my own. And even though I play around with the idea of expanding the SO CLE SHAY brand, I also worry that it might lose its genuineness when it becomes something I do for business instead of pleasure. That’s not to say I don’t have a multitude of other ideas swarming around in my brain. Your girl will be an entrepreneur and businesswoman one day and I’m betting that it’s one day soon.

I’m relatively happy most days. I have become more mindful about what I allow to affect me. Even the positive person can have a bad day and that’s okay. On a journey getting to know myself and it’s not always fun and positive. Sometimes it’s ugly. Sometimes I worry if the standards I have for my life might be impossible to attain or maybe I’m in my own way.

Clearly, I got a lot I need to work through. See you next week!

Shay ❤

#FeatureFriday: Queens on the Scene

Last Sunday’s Queens on the Scene, all female showcase and cypher, turned out to be an event with nothing less than a mix of great talent, good vibes, and black girl magic. The event was held on December 3, 2017 at Take5 Lounge in Downtown Cleveland. It was hosted by TheBeatByCee, who actually put together the all female cypher and started The Cleveland Cypher Campaign, and Andrew Lloyd, founder of the Ohio Entertainment Awards. The headliners for the event were Britt Bandz, Caity 380, Cathern Danille, and Saranova.

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It was awesome to see a group of so many women come together to showcase their skills and support one another.

Tierra Kahli kicked off the night with a chilling piece that literally almost brought everyone to tears. It gave off feelings of nostalgia with its references to black culture and experiences that ranged from electric sliding and greasing our scalp. It brought to mind words like resilience, strength, and persistence when she talked about how last night she decided not to cry, but instead do a bunch of things (black shit) that just made her happy.

I honestly believe she set the tone for what would be an awesome event. Her performance was followed by a slew of amazing acts that lit fire to the stage. And despite, some technical difficulties the women remained steadfast in delivering memorable performances that had everyone off their feet and dancing like we were carefree.

Some of my favorite acts of the night would have to be the performances by Britt Bandz, and Cathern Danille, and the cypher that showcased artists Sunny, Kira Killa, Caity 380, and Katie Starr.

It was a magical night of unity. Of light and love. And an ultimate celebration of feminine power, sexuality,  and positivity.

In a city that claimed six lives within a week prior to this showcase, one of which was Ohio King, DeSean “Box the Beast” Perkins, it was beautiful to see that maybe us Clevelanders aren’t all about violence. It was in this night of sisterhood where I saw hope. Hope for the future and motivation and determination from an underrepresented group in a male dominated field. It was like it took a woman’s healing and nurturing touch to not make us necessarily forget the pain of the previous week, but to make us reflect and push forward for a better tomorrow.

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Andrew Lloyd and DJ CoCo Z

“If you’re not doing what you love and living the life you want, get out there and do that shit.” said Andrew Lloyd when speaking to the packed house during his speech about the loss of his business partner and brother.

 

Rest in Peace DeSean ” Box the Beast” Perkins and to anyone who has lost their life. And to all my readers: be safe.

Shay ❤

 

#MondayMusings: A Cultural Critique of She’s Gotta Have It

In a time where social media is overrun with sad news stories about local violence being on the rise and another man in power being accused of assaulting yet another woman I felt it necessary to unplug and venture off into a different world last week. I decided to delve deep into the world of 27 year old Brooklyn artist, Nola Darling, the main character in the Netflix series She’s Gotta Have It. shes-gotta-have-it-netflix-canceled-renewed-1038x576

From first gaze, you want to compare She’s Gotta Have It to Insecure or one of the many shows starring a beautiful melaninated sister, but I’m here to say it’s so much more. From the way it educates you with an abundance of black culture through the music, art, literature, and historical references to its satirical spin on beauty standards, sex/sexual harassment, and racial issues. Nola Darling is progressive thinking and fluid not allowing herself to be pigeon holed or boxed into any particular idea of what a woman should be.

She’s not a freak.

She’s not broken.

And she’s not misguided.

She just likes to have sex. Sex on her terms and with who she deems worthy.

At first gaze, you would think, “wow three men? Really!?” but  I say that’s her business. As long as she’s safe and honest. Let her do her.

Nola Darling actually inspires me. She is living free and in her truth. Not beholden to society’s respectability politics on how a woman , especially a black woman, should act.

I feel her! Now I’m not saying I have to sleep with multiple men, but I understand why she does it. Because she can! And she is self aware enough to know that a monogamous relationship is not what she wants. All her lovers provide something different for her and feed her in different ways. They all also take pieces from her because she gives them something outside of sex that they need. They all try as hard they can to lock her down and own her and create a life for her that they think she should have with them and Nola hits them all like, “Nah bruh.”

The only person Nola Darling belongs to is herself. The only person she is committed to loving and growing is herself.

She’s the love of her OWN life and honestly that shit is dope!

Too many times I see women commit to men as wives and commit to children as their mothers before they have truly learned to love themselves. Then, they wonder why they might fall short in these areas, but I honestly thinks it’s because they never learned to have a healthy relationship with themselves.

I think once you get passed whether you think Nola Darling is a “freak” or “hoe” you’ll realize that Nola Darling is who she wants to be and everyone can’t say that. Everyone can’t say they’re living their best life expressing themselves, growing themselves and ultimately loving themselves.

I can’t just yet, but I want to and I’m going to take a page out of Nola Darling’s book and strive to from this day going forward.

Check out the full series on Netflix! I tried to say just enough without giving the show away so you’re welcome lol

P.S. Ya girl is back y’all and I am so inspired!

See you next week!

Shay ❤

#FeatureFridays: The Underrated Showcase

“They brought me here one because of my beard and because I’m what….because I’m Puerto Rican”- said Cleveland rapper, Rosello Stone, just before he proceeded to get the crowd up and onto their feet with his hit Westside (Who Run It).

Rosello Stone and Andrew Lloyd

This past Sunday, August 13, I had the pleasure of being invited out to a hip hop and R&B showcase competition by the amazing Andrew Lloyd. His name might sound familiar because I wrote a profile piece on him back in May after I attended his film festival.

His most recent showcase, The Underrated Showcase Competition, was created to be a platform where local Cleveland artists could show off their skills and promote their craft all while in the spirit of friendly competition.

The showcase featured 27 artists, from all over Cleveland, that provided us with a spectrum of music that ranged between hard core hip hop and smooth and sexy R&B. Each contestant was judged off of:

  • crowd reaction/participation
  • appearance
  • delivery
  • stage presence
  • creativity
  • quality of music.

The competition was judged by Mookie Montonio and Box TheBeast and hosted by who other than, Andrew Lloyd.

Overall, I have to give the event a 9 out of 10. The location was great and provided a cool vibe. And best of all most of the talent that graced the stage was absolute fire. I know without a doubt the judges had a hard job on their hands.

In the end, the winner of the $50 cash prize, spot on the Ohio Entertainment Awards Summer 17 Tour, and profile piece on So Cle Shay was the bearded Puerto Rican rap God from the West Side of Cleveland, Rosello Stone. Other artists, that while they did not win, did do a good enough job to land a spot on the OEA Summer 17 Tour included Tiffany MissFitted Williams, Chelci Renee, and CTuck.

Some other heavy hitters that happened to be my personal favorites were the performances by Louchiano Redd with his hit Dope Boii and Milli Boii Foreiign with his song Tapout.

And of course I can’t leave out the performance of one of Cleveland’s hottest artist, Bandanna Bikerboy with From the Land who is also one of the headliners of the OEA Summer 17 Tour.

Keep a lookout for the above mentioned artists because they’re definitely entertaining and other musicians have to get ready to step their game up. You can find their music on various sites like Sound Cloud, Spotify and YouTube to name a few and if you have some time be sure to check out the OEA Summer 17 Tour coming to a city near you.

Ohio Entertainment Awards Summer 17 Tour Dates:

  • August 18th; Columbus, Ohio: The Glow Lounge
  • August 19th; Dayton, Ohio: The Jazz Central
  • August 20th; Alliance, Ohio: Jupiter Studios
  • August 26th; Akron, Ohio: Just A Dream Studios
  • August 27th; Cleveland, Ohio: Take 5 Lounge
  • September 2nd, New York, New York: TBA